Thursday, 25 November 2010

Why I'm Tired by 10am


Baby: Let's play! PLAY PLAY PLAY LA LA LA.

Me: Zzzzzzzz.

Baby: You're not looking at me. LOOK AT ME. WATCH HOW I WIGGLE.

Me: (takes baby downstairs so no one else wakes up) Zzzzzz.

Baby: Ooh, a shiny thing. I shall eat it. NOM NOM NOM. Hang on, you're not looking at me again! LA LA LA PLAY PLAY PLAY.

Me: Hello baby. You are torturing me. Thanks for that.

Baby: Tired now. Want milk. Zzzzzz.


Me and Baby: Zzzzz.


Me: Is still dark. Go 'way.

Kid 1: I need to use the toilet. I'm hungry. Watch me do this cartwheel!!!!!

Kid 2: HELLO MUMMY. I'm cold, can I put my icy extremities inside your warm blanket, waking the baby up? THANKS!!

Me: Shh. Baby is still sleeping. Please stop touching me.

Kid 3: IneedaweeIneedaweeIneedawee.

Me: So... go? (gives into fate and gets up for the day)


Me: Stop playing nicely and get ready for school. (Did I really just tell my kids to stop playing nicely? What twilight zone is this?)


Baby: No one is looking at me. This situation is intolerable.

Me: Maybe I can manage to both eat breakfast and shower this morning?

Baby: POO! Poo is fun! Lots of poo for you, momma! LA LA LA PLAY PLAY PLAY

Me: No.


Me: Get your bags, kids! Lunch? Coat? Gloves? Scarf? Hat? Swimming kit? Homework? Show and Tell toy? Permission slip? Dinglehoppers and Snarfblats? Let's go!

Kids: We're so cold. We hate the world. Oh, look, a squished worm!


Kids are in school. Another morning survived.

Me: (haunted look)

Baby: Zzzzz. (for now)

Wednesday, 24 November 2010

Watch out, world, here she comes

As I am sitting here, chilling out with the kids and watching cartoons (as you do), I just saw my baby -- who will not be officially 6 months old until December fifth -- get up on her hands and knees and launch herself forward and face first into the carpet.

I knew this was coming, and declared that she will be crawling by Christmas. At this rate, it will probably be by next week.

I'm not sure why she's in such a rush to start crawling, though. Everyone gives her everything she could ever want. Slow down, baby girl!

Wah-Hey, it's almost Turkey Day!

Thanksgiving always sneaks up on me. I've been living in England for 11 years, and I suppose because I'm married to an Englishman and don't live in my home country, I tend to forget about Thanksgiving until the week before. Sometimes even the day before. (for shame!)

But not this year! This year we are having our American friends over with their passel of children, and we're cooking up a turkey and some yummy vegetables and PIES. It's going to be glorious.

I'm also going to give turkey brining a go. Wish me luck on that one; the turkey is such a central theme to the meal, that it's kind of nerve wracking when you try a new recipe with it. Realistically, though, when would I break out a 10lb turkey to practice a new recipe? It's do or die, starting tonight when I soak it in brine.

The kids and I made turkeys out of our traced hand shapes, and hung a sign up. They don't really have a concept of Thanksgiving (see my lacadasical attitude mentioned above), so it's just going to be a big meal with lots of running around the house with their friends.

It's going to be SUCH FUN.

Tuesday, 23 November 2010

Early Morning Wake Up

My kids are painfully early risers, and it has caused no end of frustration in me over the years. I have never enjoyed waking up earlier than 7am or so, but my kids seem to think 6am is a perfectly acceptable time to start the day. They basically open their eyes and start zooming around the house at 100 miles and hour, not slowing down until bedtime.

Unfortunately for me, the baby seems to be going down a similar path. She has been waking up before 6am recently, and chatting away to herself VERY LOUDLY until I take her downstairs to her toys. There's no point in losing my patience with her (unlike with the older children, who tend to jump from the top bunk, screeching, or dump entire boxes of cereal on the floor), but it is frustrating to lose an hour of sleep when EVERYONE ELSE in the house is sleeping, but you can't because the baby is too busy practicing her crawling and paper eating skills.

By the time she is losing steam a bit, everyone else is awake and preparing their daily mayhem. Fights over who gets to use the toilet first, wandering around in their underwear for 20 minutes because they can't seem to remember where their school clothes are (check the drawer, kid!), and jumping on a sleeping Daddy are often daily occurances. One of the most annoyingly ironic things about early mornings before school, is that the kids tend to play best together during this time. I hate to break them up with my harping (GET READY FOR SCHOOOOOOOOLL!! YOU'RE MAKING ME CRAAAAAZZZZYYY), but I tend to think it's a bit of a conspiracy on their part. Maybe one of these days, I won't make them go to school at all, because they are playing so nicely together. Heh.

Basically, morning times are chaotic and full of crabby people. It's not the best way to start the day, really.

Saturday, 20 November 2010

There's a Zombie on my Lawn!

..but I've got my defences set up already..



I have never made 3D plushies before, and after extensive research on the internet, I managed to make these two little guys over the course of several days.

Anyone who is familiar with the computer game Plants vs Zombies will know that the green one is a Pea Shooter, and the blue one is a Snow Pea. They are an integral part of your basic defence systems in case of a zombie attack.

I for one feel better that they are around to defend my home. I've got a few more plants sprouting up around here, so keep your eyes peeled!

Wednesday, 17 November 2010

Little projects

Life is busy, and I am tired, but I've been slowly plugging away at a few projects. My hexagon quilt is slow going, but I knew that when I started:

It's going to be awesome when I finally finish! And yes, there is a teeny little hedgehog in the middle of the bottom right hexagon. So cute.

Speaking of cute, look at these little dollies!
Laboriously hand sewn for my daughters' Christmas presents. I originally made a gigantic (about 10x the size of these 9" dolls) version as a test run and my three year old latched onto it really quickly. I like doing the small versions, though, as I can sit around watching tv as I sew them.

Using the same pattern, I made some zombie dolls for the kids, too.

I know, y'all are probably thinking "what on earth?!" so let me explain. I recently bought a copy of the computer game, Plants vs Zombies, and its popularity in our house is nothing short of epic. The kids live and breathe this game; when they aren't actually playing it (because I dole it out in small portions and use it as a bargaining chip for good behaviour OF COURSE), they act it out and pretend to be zombies and plants. All three of them have perfected their zombie walk, and try to eat my brains regularly.

So I figured, why not capitalise on this obsession and make some toys that they will really love? The dolls don't look anything like the zombies from the game, but I am in the process of making a few plant replicas out of felt. I have zero experience creating 3D plushie toys, so it's slow going, but I'm almost finished with my first pea shooter! I will definitely post some pictures when I'm done, because I'm quite excited with how its turning out already. I think it'll be cute.

Tuesday, 16 November 2010

Life in all its intricacies

Some things my son will eat for dinner:
  • steamed broccoli
  • corn on the cob
  • mashed potato
  • pasta of any sort
  • mild cheddar cheese by the truckload
Things he will not eat for dinner:
  • any other cooked vegetable
  • salad vegetables
  • stews, chilli, curries
  • someone else's leftovers that haven't even been germified for goodness sake
Things my three year old obsesses over:
  • tv time
  • chapstick
  • nail polish
  • juice
  • receipts
  • taking baths with the baby
Things my seven year old wishes she could do:
  • wear glasses
  • wear makeup
  • reach the top shelf where we hide sweets and biscuits
  • stay up later than the other kids
  • speak French fluently
Habits my 5 month old has fallen into:
  • forgetting she can roll from her stomach to her back, getting stuck and needing rescuing
  • sleeping for 20 minutes every evening about an hour before bedtime (gathering strength, I guess?)
  • pushing herself backwards across the room while blowing raspberries into the carpet
  • smiling at everything but laughing at only her biggest sister, no matter how hard I try!
  • eating paper whenever she can
  • catching all the little colds going around this autumn (sigh)

I've been working on a few things these past months, especially Christmas gifts for the kids. I'll update with pictures soon!